Prepare thyself, he who reads this, to tremble and quake before the Incredible Word of God, as written by THE LORD HIMSELF!
Today I would like to talk about something that truly disgusts Me – the fucking stupid butt-fucking slanty-eyed continent of Asia.
Asia is a huge FUCKING waste of space and I despise every last FUCKING country, animal* and heathen-commie-bastard living there. However, I don’t hate the topography. Unlike Africa – which I am deeply, deeply ashamed of – I’m actually kind of satisfied with the land I made in Asia (with the exception of the Russian, Mongol and Kazakhstani areas).
No, it’s strictly the people and the governments of Asia I FUCKING loathe. Why you ask? Because they don’t FUCKING Worship Me! I mean, for FUCK-Sake! I’m only the FUCKING Flawless Creator of the Entire FUCKING Universe, but do they FUCKING care? No, they totally FUCKING ignore Me.
And what do they do instead? Waste their FUCKING time worshipping FUCKING impudent philosophers and smelly 4-armed bitches and all kinds of other STUPID FUCKING BULLSHIT.
But you know what really, just absolutely FUCKING kills me about Asia? The crazy number of people there that spend their whole lives just blatantly FUCKING ignoring My Existence. It’s the largest continent on My Planet and it contains over 60% of all FUCKING human life. THAT’S 4 BILLION FUCKING PEOPLE! And I, The Almighty Lord, only have a pitiful 25 million followers in the entire stupid FUCKING continent!!!
Absolutely FUCKING pathetic. But ya know, I can’t help but feel that it’s partially My Fault. Maybe if I hadn’t wasted so much FUCKING time focusing solely on Israel back in the old days, maybe if I had just diversified more, I wouldn’t have this FUCKING problem today.
And there is no FUCKING converting these pagans either! I know, I’ve tried. I’ve sent wave after wave of My most intimidating FUCKING missionaries there, all to no FUCKING avail. Did you know worship of Me is FUCKING banned in China? It’s FUCKING true!
I tell you, it’s FUCKING frustrating. As a result, I mostly try to smite Asians as much as I FUCKING can. I’m always smiting them with tsunamis and earthquakes and volcanoes and plagues and small penis. Why, just last week I hit up China with a FUCKING ‘quake and Myanmar with a FUCKING Cyclone. Even still, I only managed to kill a measly 120,000 FUCKING Asians. Great. Only another FUCKING 3,999,880,000 more to go.
*I’m the reason Pandas won’t fuck to save their species. I fucking hate Pandas.
Does anyone have any suggestions as to how to wipe out more Asians more quickly?
Please don’t suggest plague, unless you’ve got the formula for something just killer. I got My Hopes up with SARS and bird-flu, only to see damned science step in and ruin everything again.
AIRBORNE EBOLA FOR MY SAKE! I’ve been saying you should use this shit for decades now but you don’t listen. If ebola became airborne it has a projected 90% kill rate, not just in Asia but over the whole globe.
First you crucify me, then I don’t get that boss Schwinn 10 speed for my last birthday and now you don’t even take my suggestions into consideration. I HATE YOU!
Jesus! You’re such a dumbass. 90% kill rate of everyone in the world? That’s a bit much, don’t you think?
I just want to kill Asians, not My people! Dumbass. More specific than ebola. Jesus, remember when you created AIDS? That was a good one. More like that, except for Asians instead of fags and drug addicts.
It’ll be hard, they’re resiliant little buggers.
How about a form of HIV that comes from reading textbooks? those fuckers always have their nose in some calculus, physics, computer science, engineering, or chemistry book. That would be pretty effective.
You know what else blows about asia? Some obviously indian customer service prick telling me, through his kwik-e-mart accent, that his name is “Justin” over the phone. BULLSHIT! It’s mohammed or shiva or something, but it sure as shit aint justin!
Man I hate Panda bears….and why did you create an animal so stupid it won’t screw to save its species?
What are your feelings towards Japan? I know you hate Asia but does that also apply to all Asians that don’t live on the actual continent of Asia? I ask because I think the Japanese would be a great way to kill other Asians. Don’t let that image of a gold fish tending sandal wearing Japanese fool anyone, they are ruthless killers when properly motivated.
Also, how do you feel about the band Asia?
FYI: I am of Japanese decent and if you don’t like my people you can suck my small penis!
why not just send a fire ball of death at a major asian city? like you did in siberia a century ago. then agian any attempt to fuck them up will probably get all the rich countries to donate money and aid to them. but im sure the commie government will just keep it to themselves:)
Asia has already paved they way for their own destruction;
North Korean has nuclear weapons and has its eyes on South Korea and Japan
China’s industrialization has reeked havoc on their eco-system
Russia has been plagued with a skyrocketing STD infections since the fall of communism.
Nobody really cares about Mongolia
Kazakhstan mines uranium that’s feeding N.Korea that inevitably lead to war.
My only suggestion to speedy up the process is to send the Church of Scientology that way they either go broke making them easy to invade or they kill themselves.
God please smite Tom Cruise and his church.
I like pandas. SAVE THE PANDAS. but that’s it
Just give them all SUVs. Between the polution and their driving skills, that should take care of it.
“He that blasphemeth the name of the LORD, he shall surely be put to death, and all the congregation shall certainly stone him.” — Leviticus 24:16
Bridgette is such a smart person. I’m hoping she moves to asia when you finally God-size Hadooken that place…
Kaicho,
HADOOKEN! hahaha. I hate Asia but I do love Street Fighter 2. My favorite character – M.Bison. I DOMINATE!
Aric,
I hate Asia and that includes Japan. Especially Japan. Hiroshima? Nagasaki? I invented the atom bomb strictly for blowing up Japs. I also HATE the band Asia. Blech!
Cooper,
Do not fear. Tom Cruise and his Church of pagan ‘scientololigists’ are on My Radar and due for a hefty smiting.
Bridgette,
Thanks! Keep up the good work reminding everyone what happens if they make fun of Me!
Dear God,
I love how effective eastern medicine is. I mean, that’s totally why some of the most decrepit looking people i see on the train are Asian, right.
Something tells me you’ve been doing some small-scale smiting and waiting for us to notice your hard work.
Your Friend,
Crystal
But ninjas are so fucking cool.
Here’s a thought: speed up plate tectonics. Break off the parts you don’t like, annihilate them, then spring up an erupting volcano and just the hell over already….
And whatup with the Russian hating? Even that gorgeous hunk of rat-bastard, man love, Putin is a freakin’ Christian…
it seems as soon as i stopped caring about the length of this blog, i stopped caring about the blog in general.
i no longer like this blog. i no longer like god. and it is my mission to TAKE THIS BLOG DOWN!!
DAMN YOU UNPLEASANT JEW!!! YOU…WILL….NEVER TAKE DOWN THIS BLOG!!!
Be careful Unpleasant Jew, we haven’t heard from Dick Franing after he lashed out at God. Though I do miss his rants, they were amusing.
Question to God;
My GF just started job on a pyramid scan selling water purifiers, it’s kind of like Scientology but with water purifiers. She won’t believe me. Can you smite pyramid scammers even if you have to take down the GF? It’s time for a new one anyway. Having to agree with her about this for the sake of some pre-marital sex makes me feel dirty.
GOD’S SCARED! GOD’S SCARED OF THE TRUTH!!!
To the Jew formally known as “unpleasant”,
Why the sudden turnaround?
Any reason?
Do you ever feel like there is a secret war going on in the heavens that no one knows about?
I feel it. It is real.
Does God hate stereotypes???
stuffblackpeoplelikealso.wordpress.com
I can’t say, but I’m pretty sure God hates people whoring their blogs here after posting irrelevant comments!
Also nice URL.
Cooper,
Pyramid scammers stole your girlfriend, eh? You like that? That’s how I hook you up because I love you Cooper!
I find a way to separate you from the clutches of these evil whores because you are a good man. Only if I hated you would I leave you with this trollop!
thinkb4ublink,
DIE! FUCKING DIE!
I’m with you Judas. Hahaha. Indian tech guys who claim they’re named Bob and Steve and shit. Fuckin’ liars.
inmate1972,
Russians may be Christian – but they’re the completely wrong kind of Christian. Besides, I don’t like the way they talk.
This blog is just plain bad. It’s stupid, juvenile, racist and worst of all it’s not even close to resembling anything even halfway amusing. Get a life ‘god’ and stop wasting you time trying to write.
Hey, leave the Philippines outta your plans, mkay? We’re the only predominantly Christian country in Asia! ^^
Wrong kind of Christian? They’re Orthodox!
…as a follow up: don’t tell me you prefer those whack-job, bible beating Baptists who could care less about you and more about the dead Nazarene on a stick….
Greece is Orthodox also… Russia borrowed the Orthodox religion from Greece.
inmate,
You act as if I should just tell you mortals which sect of Christianity is the right one. LUDICROUS!
If you really loved Me, you would just know!
*cough*cough*
How could you screw up your math, God? 90++% of the Philippine population is made up of Christians. The Philippines has more than 80 million people in it. That’s waaaaaay more than 25 million.
I thought you were omniscient. Tsk tsk.
Dean and Gian Paolo,
Again, Filipinos are the completely WRONG kind of Christian! They don’t count!
the first New Testament Bible was written in Greek, and the religion in Greece is Orthodox, Russia adopted the Orthodox religion… so God, wtf are you saying? the only real difference between the eastern (orthodox) and western (catholic) is that eastern does not believe the Pope is infalable, we belive in iconography, and we dont worship the virgin Marry… AND YOU HATE THE VIRGIN MARY!! So maybe you should rethink which is the RIGHT christianity, if there really is one. Smite that.
J-Moke said:
“which is the RIGHT christianity, if there really is one.”
Exactly! Isn’t that kind of the point of this blog? God doesn’t really exist and there is no one true religion?
the one right christianity is judaism.
FACE!!!!!
[...] example, God Hates Asia: … I mostly try to smite Asians as much as I can. I’m always smiting them with tsunamis [...]
I have it on good authority that God also hates pumpkins, the country of Mexico, Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Lucky Charms cereal.
I know this because one of his representatives, a traveling youth minister, informed the youth congregation at a local church of the things God hates. He must be right if he speaks for God, huh?
JavaJiveHigh,
I do indeed hate all of those things…intensely. That traveling youth minister you speak of is a fine fellow and one of My most trusted servants.
Heed his words and live.
God,
By “wrong kind of Christian,” what do you mean? And, why did you allow mankind to create razors if you don’t shave your face?
Any movies you hate?
是你疯狂
上帝不恨亚洲人。 他做了那么许多我们!
God, just smite the world and let’s all face judgment. All this fighting about who is right and who is wrong is how wars get started. Let’s just agree to disagree. Or at least agree that Scientology is the real evil here.
You’re a jackass. And if I’m not right, may you smite me down….
….
…Still here.
Go wish yourself out of existence.
Amen.
Dammit God, we’ve been over this a million times. My people would worship you if you weren’t such a power-hungry control freak. That’s kind of off-putting to some people, you know? They like me better because I don’t demand blind, unquestioning obedience. On the contrary, I encourage them to doubt even me.
Don’t make me belly-bounce you, bitch.
YEAH! The Ultimate Fight Championship-Smack-down between God and Buddha!!
“In this corner, weighing in with the world of guilt on your shoulders, we have the Lord Your God! And in this corner, weighing in at nothing because he is the weight of everything being ‘One with the Universe’, we have Buuuuuuuuuuddddha!”
madam,
it has come to our attentions that you wish to register a complaints. it pleases us to inform you we now have three offices open for your continued service and satisfaction. may we also reminds you of importances of following the proper complaint procedure. your kind adherence to the procedure allows us to speedily and happily deal the complaints.
complaints must be filed in person, in triplicate, at any two of our offices. pleases ensure a filings are done concurrently. offices is conveniently located in the centres of sol, hades, and the andromeda galaxy, conveniently near public transport. we don’ts advise driving as parking in the area is extremely restricted. there are guarded facilities for parking your bicycle, and all offices are handicap-accessible. please leave your bibles at the door.
sincerely,
the asian compliants bureau.
Ding ding! The fight is on!
http://www.molleindustria.org/faith-fighter
Gee god, you created it, why don’t you fix it instead of just bitching about it like a…well human.
As usual, I end up doing all the actual work around here. God the Father is constantly bitching about how much He hates everyone and everything, and Junior is still whining about being punished for the sins of humanity. Well boo-fucking-hoo for you, Junior. It’s been 2,000 years. Get the fuck over it.
As for Asia, I’M FUCKING WORKING ON IT! These things take time. My methods are more subtle than Yours, Big Guy. But they’re WORKING! Japan’s fertility rate has dropped below replacement. There aren’t enough young workers to replace the current generation as they age and retire. They’re in for complete socio-economic collapse, sooner than anybody thinks. And the massive populations of China and India are unsustainable. You know what happens when you over-inflate a balloon? BAM! No more balloon. Yeah. That’s what I’ve been working on for the past few CENTURIES! It would happen sooner if You didn’t keep sending those fucking tsunamis and earthquakes and shit. That’s like letting air out of the balloon while I’m trying to make it fucking pop. Way to make My job harder, dumbass.
But, of course, You never fucking appreciate My efforts. Fucking typical.
Why don’t you just act thru GWB? He’s managed to kill 1 million of those Iraqi muslimofascists. Maybe he can help you in your never ending quest for death and destruction.
I love us.
/Chinese.
UP YOURS, NON EXISTENT ENTITY!
I KNOW the BIBLE is the WORD of GOD, because GOD says so in the BIBLE
– And GOD NEVER lies -
I KNOW this BLOG is the BLOG of GOD, because GOD says so in this BLOG
– And GOD NEVER lies -
(Blog? Biblog? Godlog?)
Smite us, o LORD! Smite us GÖÖÖD!
Hey God, is Mt. Everest too heavy for You to lift? I’m figuring that it is, and that’s what’s *really* got You pissed off at Asia, never mind all the billions of heathens. After all, it’s bad enough that those geeky smartasses get on *my* nerves, You know the ones who drone on and on about whether You can create a stone so heavy that You can’t lift it; considering what a pointless bullshit waste of Your Divine time that would be, they must have really had You climbing the walls. So my guess is that You finally decided fuck it and created one. And it’s gotta be Mt. Everest, considering that it’s the biggest hunk of stone we’ve got.
My suggestion is that You spend a few extra hours in the gym so that You can lift the damn thing anyway, and then chuck it on those smartass fuckers’ heads just to show them how ass-kickingly paradoxically omnipotent You really are.
You don’t exist!!
http://www.godriddance.com
Your creation,
Ryan
So when you say Asia, you mean those parts of the Eurasian landmass east of Israel? Why did you allow us to mentally divide the landmass called Eurasia into one part called Asia and one part called Europe, both of which get called continents, putting Europe in the same category as proper continents like South America and Africa? If white people had come from North America west of the Rockies, would you let us pretend that that part is a full separate continent?
And why do you make it so confusing who should be considered Asian and who shouldn’t? When I’m in the US, “Asian” means those slanty-eyed people in eastern Eurasia, while people people those populations and Europe are called Indians or Middle Easterns or Arabs or other things. When I’m in Europe, “Asian” means everyone living on Eurasia who isn’t white. Why do you let this go on?
And why have you been allowing more typos and grammar mistakes in recent years? This fucked-up attempt at a sentence in comment 61 -
“When I’m in the US, ‘Asian’ means those slanty-eyed people in eastern Eurasia, while people people those populations and Europe are called Indians or Middle Easterns or Arabs or other things.”
should have been this -
“When I’m in the US, ‘Asian’ means those slanty-eyed people in eastern Eurasia, while people between those populations and Europe are called Indians or Middle Easterners or Arabs or other things.”
I’m the reason Pandas don’t fuck. I fucking hate pandas
Or maybe you just hate fucking pandas. (Pandas that fuck.)
Well, maybe if you were doing a better job at being a supposedly “Omnipotent” god, you’d have everyone worshipping you. It appears you aren’t as powerful as that book called the Bible claims you are. Man, you must’ve had a fabulous publicist who got THAT book deal signed.
Just like us Sumerian gods, you’re on your way to being forgotten and abandoned. I mean, after all, most of Europe has stopped believing in you.
Loser.
Love,
Inanna (your mistress, bitch!)
A surefire way to kill off them chinapeople without using something infectious is to soak a bunch of pennies in a deadly poison like ricin and then make them fall from the sky like rain.
It is a little known fact that Chinamen are notoriously cheap. They put the jews to shame in this regard. A self-respecting chinaman would never walk past a penny without picking it up.
-RPTH
I would recommend voodoo dolls and with the factories in China, we could manufacture them a few cents per unit and in probably no time. However, since you HATE witchcraft and made that illegal, well… we will have to think of something else.
Hey, why not push them off the ends of the earth, since its just flat disc anyway.
god,
how about asia argento?
God you’re funny, but you should stop having anal sex with Jesus. Plus, you need to get Mike Hukabee’s lips removed from your ass.
And all those assholes here hatin on Indians .. Listen up bitches, you guys can’t fucking turn on your computer without fucking it up. You need to call us to fucking even help you get your head out of your ass. And the reason we say it’s “Steve” or “Justin” is because racist xenophobic motherfuckers like you can’t pronounce the real thing. If it were not for us Indians you guys would be still be livin in caves. So shut the fuck up and go give Bush a blow job. We are more smarter than you incestuous basteds will ever be.
You know less than we do about computers, Punjab. You just read the book from beginning to end. And the next time I have to speak with one of your unintelligible asses to cancel some stupid charges on my credit card, I’m going to become the first bloodvark in history to actively procure its sustenance.
“We are more smarter…” hehe.
<>
If He hates fucking pandas, maybe He should just stop fucking them?
Personally, I hate fucking wizards.
Hey God, aren’t you forgetting the small matter of the Deccan and Siberian Traps? in the dim distant past you flooded both the main continental mass and the subcontinent with kilometers of basaltic lava.
So you see we know how powerful your smiting can be. What’s the matter? hate Asians less than trilobites or something?
“Personally, I hate fucking wizards.”
After me now: A wizards staff has a knob on the end, knob on the end….
…but if you didn’t like Pandas, why did you make them?
I thought you made everything.
oooooo … You called me Punjab …….. How very Barack Obama of you ………
And as far as being unintelligible is concerned, at least the president of my country can pronounce ‘nuclear”.
Also, by the by, YOUR country is responsible for Simon Cowel’s fame. And the way you bozos voted like little puppies for Sanjaya was just damn hilarious.
And we don’t just read the book, we also write it. And if it weren’t for us, you guys would be eating lead out of a china bowl. So finkelstein, have a nice big warm cup of STFU and go back to surfing for nude videos of paris hilton .
Cause if you keep trying to piss us off, we WILL take your job and then all you will have left is your stimulus check. Cheers.
Can this be classified as “dashing”? Because god loves dashing things.
Go to a bible site that allows word search and type in “dash” or some variation.
http://bibleresources.bible.com/keywordsearchresults.php?keyword=dash&numpageresults=10&Submit.x=16&Submit.y=14
2nd Chronicles 25:
“The army of Judah also captured ten thousand men alive, took them to the top of a cliff and threw them down so that all were dashed to pieces.”
Psalms 137, the famous “Rivers of Babylon”:
“8 O Daughter of Babylon, doomed to destruction,
happy is he who repays you
for what you have done to us-
9 he who seizes your infants
and dashes them against the rocks.”
Isaiah 13:
“15 Whoever is captured will be thrust through;
all who are caught will fall by the sword.
16 Their infants will be dashed to pieces before their eyes;
their houses will be looted and their wives ravished. ”
It goes on and on.
No, the person whose REAL name is Nick wrote the book, so if my job had anything to do with computers and not pretending to know about them, then you’d be out of luck.
Fortunately for you, my job is being a small, blood-scavenging mammal (which is also why I don’t vote), and despite not having a three foot tongue, I think you’d fair pretty well.
Boo-fuckin-hoo …..
Whatever makes you happy white boy ……. All you can do is bitch anyway ……..
I get it .. Living in a trailer can make one as retarded as you sound ….. And of course … Bitter………
Now go back to the Polygamist compound where you came from ……..
You’re a very racist person for a deodorant-shunning, cow-worshipping, stinky food eater. It’s okay, I secretly wish I lived in America too. Wait, I do. I can tell because there aren’t cobras living in my house.
It’s too bad you freaked out last time you tried to move here.
By the way, I’m not white.
I’m mostly brown with some tan trim.
hahaha GodisaLyingPigeon! You’re roasting on the US? The people that invented the phones, computers, and cars you use? Sorry go back to the bronze age with your punjabi ass and fuck some goats.
Apparently Fred Phelps of Westboro Baptist DOES know what he’s talking about:
http://www.godhatesfags.com/written/fliers/20080513_china-earthquake.pdf
Notice that the release date is one day before The Almighty Jehovah posted his thought on Asia here.
Consider me converted!
Just proved my point again that most of you are racist, xenophobic jackasses who can’t differentiate between any races living in the world. What else can you expect from the land of Jerry Falwell and Mike Hukabee?
And mot of the stuff invented in the US wouldn’t have been possible without any Indians.
I hope I didn’t disturb you guys from invading the wrong country. Or from fucking your own sister.
Uh, GisLP…
One word… Calcutta. Three more words… Black Hole of… In all seriousness, though… Didn’t they (you guys?) just rename Calcutta? Why?
Other than that, hey… Nice Taj Majal. But Bollywood? Every movie is like a John Waters flick that makes you want to rip your eyes out and drip bleach slowly into your skull until your brain soaks up enough to allow sweet, sweet death to reach out with its warm embrace!
Dude, God, your godliness… You may wanna add Bollywood to that ever increasing list of smiting. Just a thought
Dude .. bollywood isn’t for you …. it works well for the people its made for …… no one asks you to see it …
and don’t tell me that everyone enjoys those sucki summer blockbusters the hollywood studios put out every summer …..
we renamed calcutta cause we wanted to ….. y did u guys vote for dubya? or his satanic vp?
no country’s perfect so wen ya guys talk smug about other people you know nothing about wen u r the cause of most of your problems ………
If u think u speak perfect english you guys need a reality check …. american english is an aberration of the language … u wudn’t know good english if it bit your ass ….
but what else can ya expect from a bunch of people who can do nothing but obsess over britney and whino the whole day?
I’m with GiaLP, any country that can make High School Musical or Hannah Montana has absolutely and utterly no basis for criticising Bollywood. His point that it is a product of its time and place is also well made. I enjoyed for eg Monsoon Wedding, which is Bollywood lite, but full on Bollywood is not for me as a white Brit. Neither is High School Musical, Blech!
And before you point the finger, we make a few crappy films (low budget natch). Though that zombie flick with Simon Pegg was mildly diverting.
There are billions of planets in this universe and even multiple parallel universes (google my name beoytch).
We can co-exist peacefully without god or his vengence on certain people……….
Classic.
Also classic.
“You guys are all racists! And you all fuck your sister and live in trailers!”
It’s only racist when you’re the majority. It’s a good thing bloodvarks are endangered.
Also funny is how defensive Apu here is about this post on a satire blog. Remember the insecure, homophobic jocks who ended up being ball sniffers?
Jesus…uh, I mean God…er….I haven’t laughed this hard for a long time.
GiLP,
i live in america. i didn’t ask to be born here anymore than you asked to be born on the set of “temple of doom”. i didn’t vote for bush. i don’t watch american idol. i don’t like crappy movies. i read books with big words. i don’t give a crap about britney. i don’t even know who sanjaya is…couldn’t pick him out of a lineup. i know how to use computers. i don’t need some crappy call center job, either…so, you can take them. i would never engage in incest for any reason. obvious not a jerry falwell fan. it would seem your vague generalizations that all americans are the way you say we are is basically just a prejudiced, bitter, uneducated point of view to have-no matter how smart you are otherwise. care to amend?
also, the point of views expressed about india are the same. except for the part about being stinky…that one is entirely true. anyway, next time i need to change a billing address i’ll give you a call and we can discuss how much better your country is than mine because that wouldn’t be demeaning to either of our respective intelligences, would it?
Gee, Big GILP, who shot your cow and tossed it on the barbee.
“We are more smarter than you ”
*giggles*
“If u think u speak perfect english you guys need a reality check …. american english is an aberration of the language … u wudn’t know good english if it bit your ass ….”
…does anyone else find it outrageously funny that this person butchered the spelling of the English language while berating us for not knowing good English? Seriously, did anyone else laugh their grammatically correct asses off while reading this?
Just wondering….
“Listen up bitches, you guys can’t fucking turn on your computer without fucking it up. You need to call us to fucking even help you get your head out of your ass.”
Well GILP. When I have a problem with my computer and need to call tech support, I can ASSURE you that it is not my intention to reach some Indian dude whom I cannot understand. In fact, I refuse to deal with anyone in tech support who does not speak American English and will ask to be transferred. And they will then give me a phone number to call a center here in the states. Did you know that? I don’t have to talk to you if I don’t want to.
If anyone is going to help me get my American head out of my American ass, I am damned and determined that I will understand the instructions in clearly spoken American English. Sorry if that makes you feel stupid and intelligible but…well, if the sari fits, wear it. I just wanted you to know that, because you seem to think we call you by choice…trust me, we don’t. Lol @ you.
“And the reason we say it’s “Steve” or “Justin” is because racist xenophobic motherfuckers like you can’t pronounce the real thing.”
Pssst. If we could understand the pronunciation of it, we could pronounce it. Funny how that leads back around to your butchering of the English language, hey Bob?
“And we don’t just read the book, we also write it.”
*sigh* Now I understand why I have so many problems turning my computer on….
God.
Wow. That is all I can really say. I have read every blog entry up to this one and every comment. and I must say the past few hours have been quite entertaining. The stupid whore at work that judges me for having superior web design skills looked at me at least 4 times with her “I LOVE JOHN MCCAIN AND HE HATES YOU” attitude simply because I was laughing so hard my redbull sprayed out my nose.
but…
The comments on this post article have to most certainly be the BEST TO DATE!
Thank you for sharing.
oh and…
PS. Punjab – I hate Bush, Dont fuck my sisters, and eat lots o cows. But I still love you I swear.
Dear God,
Your latest Japanese earthquake smiting resulted in a measly 10 dead Asians, with 320 wounded and 12 missing.
Do even you call that “trying”?
Nice website!!
FUCK this post is so much fucking better now. I reread it and I must fucking admit that all the fucking is making me fucking hornier then fucking snorting 8 viagra while watching fucking the boxed set of “OLSEN Twins – the early years”.
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[...] The stupid Me-damned Olympics are back, once again! Not only that, but they’re being held in the Asian nation of [...]
On this day, 21 September 2008, I, Smoggy Batzrubble of Noo Zillund, son of Mama Batzrubble (deceased in childbirth) and Papa Batzrubble (serial killer–executed), post this message in praise of Almighty God, the Omniscient, the Omnipotent, and the Fiercest SMITING Bastard in the universe, who has granted me a great victory in my contest with the Pagan Priestess Anne (spitting staples) Johnson.
For evidence to support my faith I refer you to “God on the Internet” postings 600 and 609.
Praise be to God. This message is posted on every thread in HIS honor.
Signed
Servant Smoggy
AMEN
Uh, Hey God. Your son Jesus, is fucking ASIAN. Retard. Figured you’d know that- considering you created him in your image and he was born in the continent of ASIA and all.
Douchebag.
Love you!
2001 Andromedical Study
Average Erect Penis Size of 15 Nations:
1.France 16 cm
2.Italy 15 cm
3.Mexico 14.9 cm
4.Germany 14.48 cm
5.Chile 14 cm
6.Colombia 13.9 cm
7.Spain 13.58 cm
8.JAPAN 13 cm *Average For Study
9.USA 12.9 cm LOL!
10.Venezuela 12.7 cm
11.Brazil & Saudi Arabia 12.4 cm
13.Greece 12.18 cm
14.India 10.2 cm
15.South Korea 9.6 cm
*The Japanese have been scientifically proven to have a larger average erect penis size than American men. LOL The Japanese also made the average for the study as well as the average international range.
12.9 cm is the official, scientifically proven average erect penis size for American men as established in a study conducted at the University of California in which the penises were actually measured by American urologists. The study was published in the American Journal of Urology, the official journal of the American Urological Assn.
The Andromedical Study is the ONLY SCIENTIFIC STUDY regarding international comparative penis size in existence. It is the ONLY study intended to compare penis size internationally.
ATTENTION:
The Japanese have a larger average erect penis size than American men. It has been scientifically proven. The results of the Andromedical Study, the ONLY SCIENTIFIC STUDY REGARDING INTERNATIONAL COMPARATIVE PENIS SIZE IN EXISTENCE, are FINAL!
Japan 13 cm; USA 12.9 cm LOL
American men are so damn fat that they can’t even find their below average 12.9 cm penises. LOL American men have very small penises. The Japanese are bigger.
Japan 13 cm; USA 12.9 cm LOL
I don’t think I like you.
Jim asked him once. I dont know how . He answered quietly, gravely, No. And a great deal more. There are other issues involved, besides questions of fact. Shouldnt you want to find out the reasons? You cannot expect them to support science. Id like you to understand.
As soon as Irins head tucked into the curve of her neck, tears broke out. See to your people, take a bath, hold Irin —a wistful pause there— then we should talk. If were something new and unexpected, then how do you know were not in love? They had fought about it too often for Eyrhaen not to know what he meant. His control rushed up around hers, holding her in, holding her back. Her gifts were not of the same caliber, as they were divinely enhanced. She had neither seen nor asked after Tykir, Lanthan, nor Brevin. She grinned at Eyrhaen, smoothing a hand over the white patterns etched in Hyles chest. Maybe she should run and change. Eyrhaen bobbed her head, loose hair falling forward over her shoulders. What more do you want me to say? The outer door to her suite opened quietly. Does this mean you forgive me? A tiny bud that burst alive when warm lips slid over it. Did he take your ass? Yet more fingers stroked her clit while it dragged Brevins length. He stopped beside a chair matching the couch, perhaps three paces away. His demeanor this night was different. And Im hardly one to object, given that Im truemated to another. She licked his lips.
I Hate fucking dumb shit asians all they do is talk worse than Mexicans they are piece of shit dirtbags that need to stay in fucking asia and make their pennies a day if they dont work they need to be mass murdered the jews needed to live the asians need to go to forced labor camps and be forced to eat cow shit they all need to die
i was laughing so hard, when i was reading it
when asians, mexicans or indians in particular try to get to australia just blow their fucking boat up with a german ww2 rocket, and just keep doing this till they fuck off n die in their own country and stop ruining countries like australia, england and america and making it so hard to get jobs. Im not racist im religious but i cant help hating these fuckers and want them culled.
Oh well its hard isnt it .
nice blog! 10 stars
please kill all the fucking japs first
Lol pandas. good post and great blog!
YOU MOTHER FUCKER, YOU ARE THE BIG BASTED
I hope you guys knnow you all evolved from asians.
OH WAIT. Christian site-!!! My bad! You don’t believe in evolution! Just god farting and all of us suddenly being on Earth. Sorry.
This is the hottest babe at this site so far! O_o More like this please!
one more time if the author of the blog write this anywhere you’re dead.remember there is only one god.never write this about Asians.idiot.
you know what, the author thinks that god gave him messages that he hate these stuffs.he will deserve one day for what he wrote.